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The sound of inevitability

April 10, 2010

Beginning play this Saturday at The Masters, The Serial Adulterer, sponsored by Nike, is two strokes off the lead. How will Western Civilization survive if Tiger Woods is allowed to win? Why would the golf gods permit such calamity to befall us mortals? How could they let such evil triumph in the face of the good and the righteous and the faithful? Perhaps the gods are irked. Should we sacrifice a lamb to appease them? Can we sacrifice a sportswriter instead?

Tyger, tyger, burning bright,

In the forests of the night;

What immortal hand or eye,

Could frame thy fearful symmetry?


In what distant deep or skies

Burnt the fire of thine eyes?

On what wings dare he aspire?

What the hand, dare seize the fire?


And what shoulder, and what art,

Could twist the sinews of thy heart?

And when thy heart began to beat.

What dread hand? And what dread feet?


What the hammer? What the chain,

In what furnace was thy brain?

What the anvil? What dread grasp

Dare its deadly terrors clasp?


When the stars threw down their spears

And watered heaven with their tears:

Did he smile His work to see?

Did he who made the lamb make thee?


Tyger,Tyger, burning bright,

In the forests of the night;

What immortal hand or eye,

Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?


———- The Tyger  by William Blake


“I got your horse right here, his name is . . .”

The last two major Kentucky Derby preps are this afternoon, a mere three weeks to the First Saturday in May.

In the Toyota Blue Grass Stakes at Keeneland, LOM likes Pleasant Prince for the win and Interactif to make a nice run. While down in Hot Springs in the Arkansas Derby at Oaklawn Park, LOM has mortgaged The Hovel and he’s betting it all on Northern Giant at 8-1 or better, and therefore he is completely confident that Noble’s Promise will win the race, thus breaking LOM’s heart and his bankroll and putting him and the chimps out in the street.

If you are considering taking the recommendations above, remember the truest of Capitalist Precepts:  You get what you pay for.  Good luck.



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